


Better Latte Than Never

by freolia



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Matchmaking, Even if he is unbearably stupid at times, Everyone loves Kuroo, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Kuroo Tetsurou is Bad at Feelings, Kuroo Tetsurou is a Mess, M/M, Matchmaking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:28:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26888125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freolia/pseuds/freolia
Summary: "You know any funny, clever, single guys to match me with then?" Bokuto asked, a hesitant smile on his face which was just so sweet paired with all the muscles and the crazy hair. Single, gay, and a genuine sweetheart too? The universe had manifested Kuroo everything he could have ever hoped for, wrapped in rippling muscle like a Greek god.The universe had a horrible sense of humour, dropping someone like Bokuto on his doorstep now; a sweet, single guy who he got on with like a house on fire just when he'd lost all faith in his own relationships.And besides, Bokuto was asking if he knew anyone else. Not about him. Kuroo couldn't let down someone like Bokuto. He was asking for help from his bro.-aka; Kuroo is oblivious, Bokuto is eternally hopefully, and all their friends are disappointed, but never surprised.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji & Bokuto Koutarou, Bokuto Koutarou/Daichi Sawamura (side), Bokuto Koutarou/Iwaizumi Hajime (side), Bokuto Koutarou/Kuroo Tetsurou, Bokuto Koutarou/Miya Atsumu (side), Bokuto Koutarou/Oikawa Tooru (side), Bokuto Koutarou/Sakusa Kiyoomi (side), Bokuto Koutarou/Terushima Yuuji (side), Bokuto Koutarou/Ushijima Wakatoshi (side), Daishou Suguru/Kuroo Tetsurou (past), Hinata Shouyou/Kozume Kenma, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou, Kuroo Tetsurou & Everyone, Kuroo Tetsurou & Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 58
Kudos: 233





	Better Latte Than Never

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, while i am of course a massive supporter of the whole "Bokuto is an oblivious idiot" trope, have we considered that Kuroo is in fact the stupid one? ~~I swear this was just supposed to be cute, the angst got me again, Daishou I'm sorry, I love you really -~~
> 
> This is completely inspired by the new s4 fanart of Kuroo and Kenma in coffee shop aprons, can you believe Nekoma coffee is a canon thing now?? Truly, small blessings in the year from hell. Sometimes self care is ordering takeaway pizza, sometimes it's writing 15k words of crappy matchmaking coffee shop au, sometimes it's doing both of those with a large bottle of merlot, and that's ok.
> 
> Credit for the title to [NerdTree](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NerdTree/) (go read her fics they're <3 <3 <3)

“Order up, Kenma!” Kuroo called, sliding the empty takeaway cup down the counter to his friend, before turning back to the next person in the queue to take their order. The afternoon rush at Nekoma Coffee usually lasted about an hour after all the local university classes finished up, but Kuroo loved his job, and he loved the rush. It kept his mind busy and  _ far _ away from the Autumn term pressure of the final year of uni. The sun was low in the sky by this point in the afternoon, but it'd be after dark by the time he finished his shift.

“Oh, hey Kai. The usual?”    


His coursemate nodded, looking stressed as he finally made it to the front of the queue. He took marine biology, same as Kuroo; they'd applied together.  _ Unlike _ Kuroo, Kai had also elected to take an optional module on garden management. Which could have been the most interesting subject in the world, but it would never replace being able to actually afford to live. And it also meant his three-hour long practical classes came straight after a long morning in the labs, while Kuroo’s business management elective was done and dusted on a Monday morning.

“You look stressed, dude, everything good?” Kuroo asked, turning to prepare his friend’s green tea. It was barely a couple of weeks into term, and third year was already turning into a ballache for pretty much everyone. Even so, the bags under Kai’s eyes were pretty extreme.

“Didn’t get much sleep last night,” he admitted. “The new roommate is uh. A bit excitable.”

“Ah.” Kuroo nodded, setting the cup down on the counter. “Bit of a party animal?” He knew the type well enough.

Kai shook his head, smiling tiredly. “Not exactly. Just… loud, I guess. He just finds a way to make being alive really… loud. You need to meet him to understand.” He took the little cup of tea, pulling out the teabag, considering Kuroo. “I think you’d like him, actually. He’s exactly your type of person.” 

Kuroo twisted his mouth noncommittally. “I don’t know, Kai.” What even was Kuroo’s type of person? He got on with pretty much everyone. Finding people he liked enough to really get close with was another issue altogether. After the disaster with Daishou, Kuroo wasn’t massively into the idea of someone new appearing in his life, regardless of how much  _ his type of person _ they might be.

His friend pulled out a debit card, already waving away Kuroo’s protests that  _ this _ one was on the house. “Tell you what,” he said, scanning the card over the card reader, ignoring Kuroo’s look of doubt, “I’ll bring him in tomorrow, and you can make up your mind.” He turned to leave, firing over his shoulder on his way out, “He plays for the uni volleyball team!” 

Kuroo sighed, defeated as he turned to take Oikawa’s latest monstrous coffee order. Kai never usually pushed him to meet people, and the few times he had had led to some of Kuroo's closest friendships. Iwaizumi was enough proof of that.

And this guy played  _ volleyball. _ It couldn't hurt to meet them.

*

“Hey, hey, hey!” The roommate said - or rather _ , yelled _ as the next afternoon rolled around. “I’m Bokuto Koutarou!” 

Kuroo stared at him for a long, long moment, taking in the gleaming eyes, the shitty dye job which was somehow working for the guy, the bulging muscles. _ Obnoxious, _ was his first thought.  _ Hot, _ was the reluctant second.

Kai cleared his throat, an amused smile on his face as Kuroo blinked. “Kuroo Tetsurou.” He remembered his manners, smiling. “So, you’re the reason my friend can’t sleep?” He was going to  _ kill _ Kai. This was clearly an attempt on his life. 

Bokuto seemed taken aback for half a second, blinking. “Uhh…” 

Kai patted his arm. “Don’t worry, Kuroo’s always a prickly puss when you first meet him. He likes winding people up.” 

Kuroo glared. Before turning back to Bokuto with a sweet smile. “I’m joking with you, man, Kai clearly  _ deserves _ to be kept awake. Nice to meet you. What can I get you?” 

Bokuto met his grin tentatively. “Uhhhh. Akashi usually orders my coffee,” he admitted, tapping his fingers on the counter restlessly as he scanned the boards over Kuroo’s head. 

Ah, shit. Could be a friend, but Kuroo would put his money on a boyfriend if he was ordering coffee for Mr Bicep. He almost missed the follow-up words in his pondering.

“What would you recommend?” 

He really needed to stop getting distracted by those arms. He was far too old to be having crushes on cute guys in his coffee queue. “I’m a big fan of a cinnamon latte myself,” he said, raising an eyebrow. 

He sort of understood why Japan was called the land of the rising sun when Bokuto smiled at him. “That sounds good!” Even his _voice_ was nice.

“Nice, I’ll let Kenma sort your order.” He said, catching his best friend’s eye meaningfully.

“You mean you won’t be?” Bokuto asked, looking kind of disappointed.

Kuroo opened his mouth to reply, but Kenma, not for the first time in his life, decided to make Kuroo’s life exponentially harder, and shoved him away from his place at the till. “I got this.” He said quietly. Kuroo stared at him. 

“You hate doing the till.” 

Kenma just shrugged, calling the next customer forward and leaving Kuroo to flail over Bokuto and his latte instead. 

“So what do you study?” He heard behind him. Bokuto looked curious, both arms resting on the counter as he watched Kuroo steam the milk. His hoodie looked like it was straining against the biceps Kuroo could tell lay underneath.

“Marine bio,” he replied, searching for the cinnamon syrup and trying not to stare at Bokuto's arms. 

“Cool!” Bokuto said, and sounded like he meant it. “You must be smart then, huh?” 

Kuroo shrugged, willing away the heat in his cheeks. “I guess? Just want to find out where C'Thulhu's hiding.” 

"What's a..." Bokuto trailed off, making a weird shape with his mouth. _Adorable,_ Kuroo's traitor brain supplied, and he shook his head to try and get rid of the thought. "You're funny, dude. It's cute." 

"Trust me, cute is the last word, Bokuto." He poured the foamed milk carefully into the mug, creating a little leaf into the foam on the top. “What about you?” What do you study?"

“Education.” Bokuto answered, watching with wide eyes as the latte art appeared. “On a sports scholarship, though. I’m going pro with volleyball!”

“Oh yeah,” Kuroo said casually, pushing the mug towards him with a smile. “Kai mentioned you played. I was a middle blocker back in high school.”

Bokuto stared up at him, his eyes no less wide. “No way! Dude, where have you  _ been _ all my life?” 

And it took barely fifteen minutes of chatting for Kuroo to agree with the feeling. Bokuto was the easiest person he'd ever met. He could have known him for  _ years. _

Kuroo conceded that maybe Kai knew him pretty well after all. Bokuto and he got on like a house of fire until Kuroo realised his new friend was causing a pretty extensive congestion at the counter and reluctantly shooed him away. (Only after a promise he’d be back soon.)

He didn't want to admit how much quieter the shop seemed the moment Bokuto had left. 

*

After that first meeting, Bokuto started making a point of coming in more often, with and without Kai. When Kuroo had asked him, he’d just said something about the coffee tasting better, which was a lie. Nekoma Coffee was popular with students for a couple of reasons which usually revolved around  _ 'budget', _ not quality. But equally, Kuroo really wasn’t complaining, because Bokuto was  _ exactly _ his sort of person, and seeing his beaming smile towards the end of a long shift was exactly the sort of pick-me-up he’d needed in his life. Even if there was a boyfriend in the picture. 

If Bokuto was even gay, because Kuroo had never asked. And probably wasn’t going to, either. If his romantic history was a credit score, it would be lower than Kenma’s high school math percentage. He didn't want to risk fucking up something like this new friendship, not when it was so easy and light and  _ fun _ to be around Bokuto. He hadn't felt so connected to someone new in ages. They had so much in common, it was insane.

No, Kuroo was pretty happy to admire from a distance. He wasn't good at relationships, and the last one had been so disastrous that he really wasn't in a hurry to get into a new one. 

That didn't mean he couldn't help someone else out in the meantime. 

“Awh, they’re so sweet,” Bokuto had cooed across the table at him. Kuroo’s shift was over, so the two of them were just chilling, people-watching, flicking old bits of sugar sachet at each other, trying to balance teaspoons on each other's noses. Just bro stuff. 

Kuroo turned to see who Bokuto was looking at, to see two very familiar figures cuddled up at the counter. Or one figure cuddled against a rigid beanpole of a student who refused to look anything close to affectionate. 

“Oh, Tsukki and Freckles?” Kuroo said, still smiling at Bokuto’s dumb joke about owl cafes. “They’re adorable. I actually got them together.” 

The last part wasn’t strictly true, but Kuroo’s brain was operating a little bit on autopilot. He was only human after all; he saw a hot man, he wanted to impress him. (Yaku would quibble his use of ‘human’ and call him a dumb gay mess again, but Yaku was also pining bad for a six foot five Russian string bean, so he had no grounds to say anything.)

_ "You _ got them together?” Bokuto said, sounding dubious. 

Kuroo frowned, turning back to his new friend. “You doubt my matchmaking skills?” He said, pretending to be offended. “I’ll prove it. Hey, Tsukki!”

There was an aggrieved sigh. “I thought I said not to call me that.” He replied, just loud enough to carry, refusing to turn in the direction of Kuroo’s table. Yamaguchi tugged at his wrist with a smile. 

“Hey, Kuroo-san!” He beamed as he towed Tsukishima over to the table, and Kuroo grinned back, wide enough to make Yamaguchi’s falter just a little - not enough to back away. “Tsukki, don’t be rude,” he chided, looking away from Kuroo to nudge his boyfriend. 

“What do you want.” Tsukishima stared at Kuroo, already looking fed up.

Kuroo pouted. “Don’t be so mean to your old senpai,” he said, “I was just telling Bokuto how I got the two of you together.” 

“Um,” Yamaguchi said, looking unsure, “But you didn’t -” 

“Sure I did,” he interrupted, “Neither of you would have made a move without me.”

Tsukishima stared at him over the frame of his glasses. “Crashing a lecture to yell at Tadashi to  _ jump my bones _ is not ‘getting us together’.” He said bluntly. 

Bokuto laughed. “Dude, nice.”

He nodded sagely. “Someone appreciates my genius. You see? Matchmaker.” 

“But I -” Yamaguchi tried.

“Shushhhh, Freckles.” Kuroo hushed him, “You two can go.” 

“You’re human garbage.” Tsukishima said with a roll of his eyes, already turning away. 

“Love you too, Tsukki!” He called after him with a wicked grin. He got a middle finger for his trouble as Yamaguchi was towed away with an apologetic smile on his adorable freckled face. “See?” 

Bokuto hummed contemplatively, sipping from his mug. “Two talents then,” he smiled, “Awesome coffee taste and awesome people taste. Under a pretty face too.” 

"Stop, dude, you're gonna make me blush." Kuroo grinned. Bokuto flirted with everyone under the sun; he just oozed charm. Kuroo almost expected it by now.

"You know any funny, clever, single guys to match me with then?" Bokuto asked, a hesitant smile on his face which was just so sweet paired with all the muscles and the crazy hair. Single, gay, and a genuine sweetheart too? The universe had manifested Kuroo everything he could have ever hoped for, wrapped in rippling muscle like a Greek god. 

The universe had a horrible sense of humour, dropping someone like Bokuto on his doorstep now; a sweet, gorgeous, single guy who he got on with like a house on fire just when he'd lost all faith in his own relationships. 

And besides, Bokuto was asking if he knew anyone else. Not about him. Kuroo couldn't let down someone like Bokuto. He was asking for help from his bro. 

He hummed thoughtfully. "One of my friends got dumped recently, now you mention it. He's a bit of a brat, but he's a good guy." 

Bokuto looked kind of disappointed. "Oh." He tried to smile. "You aren't really selling him, man." 

"Ah," Kuroo grinned, "Trust me. You haven't seen his ass yet." 

*

**_Kupoo_ **

_ Got you a date, you're welcome 😌 _

**_Ratsumu_ **

_ Its tOO SOON you piece of shit _

**_Kupoo_ **

_ ITS BEEN THREE MONTHS, DRAMATIC FUCK.  _

_ Besides, he even has the same hair as Kita, just pretend _

_ His ass is better too  _

**_Ratsumu_ **

_ Better be the best fucking ass I've ever seen istg _

*

Bokuto trudged in a couple days later at the end of Kuroo's shift, looking kind of put out. Kenma took one look at his desolate figure and muttered he was going on his break. Bokuto’s mood were getting a little famous in the coffee shop, and not everyone else was as fond of dealing with him as Kuroo.

"Hey, Bo!" Kuroo greeted him. "How'd the date go?" He’d been supposed to be meeting Miya for coffee at a different shop that afternoon, so it was a bad sign that Bokuto was coming for  _ more  _ caffeine right after.

Bokuto stared at him mournfully. His hair seemed to have deflated. 

"That bad, huh?" Kuroo grimaced, getting a clean takeaway cup and drawing a smiley face. Bokuto would see it later. "Miya can be a bit hard work. Sometimes it takes a couple of -" 

"He turned up five minutes late, dude, and just spent the whole time huffing about how loud I was," Bokuto said, slumping on the counter and doing a passable impression of ice under a hairdryer. "I'm not getting a second chance. Although," he leaned in closer, "No offence to one of your friends, but I don't really want one."

Kuroo laughed at that. "He wouldn't take any, he knows he's an asshole. Don’t worry, he’s not representative."

"He did say you were right about my ass though?" Bokuto said, looking confused. "What did you -" 

"So Miya was a fail!" Kuroo said loudly. "Don't worry, my friend, plenty more where he came from. I have a great many wares for you." 

"Why are you talking like a travelling salesman?" Bokuto asked, giggling. He seemed in a better mood than when he'd come into the shop, which was exactly what Kuroo had been aiming for. "How many attractive, single friends do you have?" 

Kuroo winked. "Stick around and you'll find out. What can I get you today?” 

Bokuto made his usual show of checking the boards with his eyebrows all bunched up. “I don’t know, dude, all the douchey, pretentious names throw me off.” 

“I make up those names.” Kuroo said with a snort, getting the espresso machine ready.    


“I mean all those super smart, witty names really throw me off,” Bokuto amended, and Kuroo laughed. 

“Better.” He said, pondering who would be a good fit for excitable, funny, driven Bokuto. “How do you feel about tall?” Kuroo asked, tapping his chin. Some guys didn’t like to be overshadowed, and Bokuto was already pretty big.

Bokuto perked up though. “Tall is good!” He replied hopefully. “Tall is really good.” 

Kuroo’s heart panged. _ Not now, _ he reminded himself sternly. “How does ‘190cm tall’ sound?” He asked.

“How tall are you?” Bokuto asked, tilting his head to the side. 

“A crisp one eighty eight.” Kuroo grinned, “So he’s taller than both of us.”

And again, it almost looked like disappointment for half a moment in Bokuto’s eyes. “What’s his name?” 

Kuroo grabbed a napkin and a pen, and scribbled down the numbers. “Give him a call and find out.” He said, sliding it across to Bokuto along with the drink. “He’s about as far from Miya as you can get, and an absolute sweetheart. Usually has me wheezing with laughter.” 

“Well that’s something,” Bokuto said, taking a sip from the cup. “Damn, dude, this is so good! What is it?”

“Tall vanilla frappuccino with a shot of honey, full cream.” Kuroo said, biting his tongue before he accidentally said,  _ 'Just like you.' _ “Inspired by my favourite, eternally single bro.” 

“Kuroo.” Bokuto clenched his fist against his heart, looking pained. “Bro. You’re the best. This is your greatest work.” 

"My magnum opus." He grinned, spying Sakusa coming through the door and beginning to prepare his usual double shot americano. 

"You put _what_ in this?" Bokuto asked, staring at him horrified before Kuroo realised his mistake. 

"No, it means greatest work.” He said, wheezing with laughter. “Now get out, I have other customers. Call him!” He yelled as Bokuto walked away, trying not to stare at his ass. 

“You’re a disgrace.” Kenma told him, smacking the back of his head as he walked past. “Make me a soy matcha latte since you’re feeling so creative.”

Kuroo sighed. “I’m too good for all of you.” He said, to a definite snort of laughter where Tsukishima was sitting by the window.

*

“That sounds painful, my guy,” Terushima said sympathetically as Kuroo added the sixth espresso shot and finished venting about Bokuto and his perfectly defined quadriceps. “Have you considered getting laid?” 

His hand slipped, and he cursed as hot coffee scalded his fingers. He glared at Terushima as he ran his hand under the cold tap. “Thank you, Teru, that hadn’t occurred to me.” 

Terushima held his hands up defensively. “Just saying! I don’t know the guy, but he can’t be  _ that _ hot. Nothing that a good fuck won’t get out of your system. How long's it been?”

“You haven’t seen him, man.” Kuroo said, shaking his head. “Who knows though, you might be right. I haven’t had sex in months. Know anyone interested?”

Terushima winked at him. “You know the offer’s always on the table, hot stuff.” 

“Anyone who won’t give me half a dozen STD’s?” Kuroo corrected himself sweetly. Maybe he  _ was  _ just frustrated. He hadn’t been on a date in six months since the end of second year, and it had been three months since he’d fallen into bed with Oikawa on a shit-faced whim neither of them had spoken about since. And Oikawa had dated and gone on another break with Iwaizumi in that time. 

Terushima shrugged. “Maybe this is why you’re terminally single, Tets. Your standards are insanely high.” 

“Not wanting an STD isn’t an insane standard.” He jerked the six shot espresso - with a shot of blueberry to offset the heart attack - across the counter. 

And then the door jingled to reveal a face that was quickly becoming his favourite. 

“It’s my favourite customer!” He called, taking in Bokuto’s slightly lost expression. “How was this one?” 

Terushima turned to look, and immediately turned back to Kuroo, eyes wide.  _ 'That’s him?' _ he mouthed, and Kuroo made a face.  _ 'See?’ _

“So, uh. The height was good. You didn’t mention he could  _ bench press me." _ Bokuto said, his mouth quirking into a confused smile. 

Kuroo tilted his head back, laughing. “Yeah, that’s Ushiwaka.” He agreed. “He plays for Todai’s volleyball team.” 

Bokuto nodded. “Yeah, he mentioned it. Said he’d seen our last match. And uh. That my form was great. But my attitude was ‘lacking’. Hence why we'd always lose.” 

“That’s Ushiwaka!” Kuroo said again, a sideways smile. “What’s wrong with your attitude? I like it.” 

Bokuto smiled at him. “Awh, dude. But yeah. Sometimes in matches, I…” He muttered something which made Terushima laugh. 

“Didn’t catch that.” Kuroo said, stamping down his flare of annoyance as Bokuto looked at Terushima with interest. Although, if things hadn’t worked with Ushijima… Terushima and Bokuto would get on like a house on fire.

“I sometimes have a bit of a meltdown.” Bokuto said, his cheeks red. “It’s not so bad now! Hasn’t happened in ages, but my old team used to have to pick me up a lot. I don’t know what Ushijima must have watched to see one!”

“He probably researched you, bro.” Kuroo said, prepping a cup when it became clear Bokuto wasn’t going to put in an order. “Does this mean I need to find you a new date?”

“You really don’t have to,” he started, the beginnings of that smile that coated the inside of Kuroo’s ribs with warmth. “I’m -” 

Terushima cleared his throat with a grin. “Hi. I’m your new date. Terushima Yuuji.” 

Kuroo swallowed to stop himself saying anything. Sure, he’d made it clear that he wasn’t going to make a move, but Terushima  _ knew _ he liked Bokuto, even if he was trying to set him up on a date with someone else. This wasn’t just against the bro code, this was setting it on fire and convincing your dog to take a whizz on it. Terushima was blacklisted. Sneaky, back-stabbing, little -

“You good, Kuroo?” Bokuto was staring at him, concerned. He blinked. 

“Yeah. Didn’t get much sleep last night.” He said lamely. Bokuto nodded, and turned to Terushima.

“Bokuto! You one of Kuroo’s friends?” He asked cheerfully.

“Not anymore,” Kuroo muttered under his breath. Terushima glared at him. 

_ "Yes." _ He said, “We run track together. And he didn’t mention he had such handsome friends.”

Bokuto giggled, his cheeks going red. “He seems to have an endless supply.” 

“Here.” Kuroo slammed the plain americano down, regretting it instantly when Bokuto looked at him in wounded surprise. “Take your disgusting flirting outside, leave us miserable singles alone.” 

“You’re single?!” Bokuto said in surprise, too loudly, attracting some annoyed attention from other patrons. 

Kuroo rolled his eyes. "Thank you for informing everyone else too, Bo. Go have fun with Teru." 

Terushima linked his arm with Bokuto's, flicking a wink over his shoulder as he marched him out of the coffee shop. Kuroo watched him go, thinking petulantly, _ 'Well at least I'm taller than him.' _

*

He didn't see Bokuto or Terushima for a week after that, and he was almost glad about it. At least he wouldn't have to watch the two of them getting snuggly right in front of him. And technically, this was further proof of his matchmaking skills. They'd met because of him, after all. 

It didn't stop his bad mood leaking out into his customer service, a fact that his regulars started to notice pretty damn fast. 

Oikawa stared down at the little puddle forming around the base of his coffee cup, and then up at Kuroo, unimpressed. 

"Tetsu-chan," his roommate said sweetly, "I don't come and patron your tacky little coffee shop for you to throw my coffee all over me." 

"Get bent." Kuroo said shortly, already working on the next order with his back turned to the room. 

"I'm leaving you a one star yelp review." Oikawa sniffed. "My account holds a lot of sway, you know." 

"Great," he drawled, "I don't have to serve another one of your hopeful fangirls who you never bothered to tell you were already in a relationship a venti chai latte, soy milk, no ice,  _ can you draw Oikawa-chan’s face in the foam? _ What a shame. My life as I know it is over." 

Oikawa muttered something as he turned around, looking fed up. "Not like I'm in a relationship right now." 

Kuroo stared at him, surprised. "What happened? Iwa finally got fed up of burning himself on your curling tongs?" 

"If there was any coffee left in my cup, I'd throw it on you." Oikawa stared at him hatefully. "As a matter of fact, we're on a break." 

Kuroo sucked air through his teeth. "Rip. What does that mean?" 

"It means that Iwa-chan thinks it best we see other people for a little bit. Gain some perspective." Oikawa said smoothly, taking a pointed sip of his drink. 

His face didn't change, but Kuroo could tell Oikawa was genuinely upset. He could be bratty, insufferable, conniving and rude, but he was one of Kuroo's best friends. And as a friend, he had one sworn duty. 

"You want me to find you a date to get back at him?" Kuroo asked thoughtfully. Oikawa wouldn't want sympathy right now. They could binge shitty romcoms back in their flat later while they felt sorry for themselves. He made a mental note to check in on Iwaizumi as well. Iwa had been his friend for almost as long as Oikawa had at this point - the two were a pair. Oikawa might be his roommate and priority, but it was pretty unlikely it was Iwaizumi who’d screwed up.

Oikawa rolled his eyes. "When will you learn that you have no taste in people? I can get a date myself." He scoffed. 

"Well, seems Iwaizumi just learned some taste in people if he dumped your ass," Kuroo said cheerfully, "Maybe it's best for you I don't."

"He didn't dump me! We're on a break!" Oikawa said shrilly, and Kuroo laughed. 

"Sorry, can’t hear you over all of the other customers I’m supposed to be serving! I’ll text you later." He said, grinning at Oikawa. 

He almost wished Oikawa had stayed when he noticed a very familiar set of silvery spikes in his queue, belonging to a guy trying to make himself as small as possible. 

Kuroo pretended not to have noticed him until he was literally right in front of him - at which point he'd been planning to sneak off to the break room. At least Terushima was nowhere in sight.

"Hey! Hey, Kuroo!" Bokuto said before he even had a chance, and he cursed the universe. 

"Hey, man," he said, turning around with a forced smile. "Been a while." 

Bokuto nodded, looking uncertain for a second. Kuroo hated how much he'd missed seeing him every day. He hated being so reliant on someone else for _anything._ "Yeah, I didn't know if you were mad at me, or…" 

Kuroo blinked. "Why would I be mad at you?" 

"I didn't know what Teru told you?" He tried. He looked ridiculously sheepish, a buff six foot wing spiker trying to curl in on himself.

"What would Terushima have told me?" He asked, suspicious. 

"We decided to call it off, and I know he's your friend, so… " Bokuto said, still looking unsure of himself. "I think we're gonna stay friends too, but he's…" Bokuto made a face, and Kuroo laughed properly for the first time in over a week. 

"Care to elaborate?" He grinned, and Bokuto seemed to relax, checking over his shoulder. 

"He's like,  _ super  _ smart which was cute when he' d whip out a mad fact, but I felt like he expected me to keep up?" Bokuto said, and Kuroo nodded. Terushima could be a little self-absorbed and easily forgot that not everyone was at his level. "Plus he's a little  _ too  _ energetic. And that's coming from me!" 

Kuroo chewed his cheek as he started getting the mint hot chocolate ready, a little cartoon Kuroo scribbled on the side of the cup to make Bokuto smile. "Teru is a bit of a wild child." He agreed, trying not to feel too smug. He'd have to catch up with Teru and wish him his 'condolences'. 

"For sure." Bokuto said with a laugh. "It takes a lot to wear me out, dude, but he was on the right lines." 

"Does it now?" Kuroo asked, raising an eyebrow as he struggled to pull his mind out of the gutter. What  _ would  _ it take to wear Bokuto out?

"Not like that!" Bokuto said, "Although now you mention it…" He honest to god  _ winked. _ How was Kuroo supposed to respond to that? 

"Oya?" He joked instead. 

"Oya oya?" Bokuto waggled his eyebrows.

"Oya oya oy-"

Someone cleared their throat. Kuroo glared at Kenma in annoyance, before turning back to Bokuto. 

"Sorry about Terushima though, dude." He had a brainwave. "Tell you what, though, if you like smart guys…" 

Bokuto looked interested. "Yeah?" 

"My roommate's just got out of a relationship! He's pretty hot too, but don't tell him I said that. You want me to set something up?" 

Bokuto stared at him blankly. 

"You sure you like smart guys?" Kenma asked bluntly, and Bokuto turned to him with a tired smile. 

"Maybe I do like them kind of stupid." He said. Kenma snorted. 

Kuroo stared between them, eyes narrowed. In a parallel universe, parallel-Kuroo wouldn't be a massive wet wipe and would have dragged parallel-Bokuto out on a date by now. He even made Kenma laugh? 

"I don't like it when you two scheme," he complained lightly, "That's supposed to be my job.” He held his hand out. “Gimme your phone.” 

Bokuto complied, still smiling as he watched Kuroo tap out a message. 

**_Xxx-xxxxx-3467_ **

_ Hey, this Oikawa? It’s Bokuto. Your super awesome smoking hot roommate Kuroo gave me your number. Date on wednesday @3pm? _

“How’d you know I’m free at Wednesday at 3?” Bokuto asked as Kuroo handed his phone back. 

“Because you’re always in here at three on a Wednesday, dipshit.” Kuroo said with a laugh, handing him his drink. “An hour before you’re supposed to be at practise.” 

“Oh shit!” Bokuto said, eyes wide. “I gotta run, catch you later!” 

Kuroo laughed as the door slammed shut behind him, his heart lighter than it had been in days now Bokuto had reappeared in his life.

“Are you ever going to ask him out yourself?” Kenma asked him, his eyes heavy and tired as he looked up from his phone. Kuroo would complain about running the counter himself, but it was Kenma. It would be a waste of his breath. 

“Ken, it’s too late for that now.” He explained, wiping the nozzle on the espresso machine. “We’re bros. I’m so deep in the friendzone I should rename it the hadopelagic zone.”

Kenma just sighed as Kuroo's phone pinged. 

**_Brat._ **

_ You aren’t awesome or smoking hot. And Bokuto better be the most handsome man I’ve seen in my life or your hair is being repurposed as a toilet brush ♱♡‿♡♰ _

*

To his great surprise, when Bokuto came back on Friday, he had a friend with him. And this was someone he knew. 

“Chibi-chan!” He said, his eyebrows high. “I didn’t know you came to Chuo!” 

Hinata grinned at the sight of him. “Kuroo-senpai! Yeah, they offered me a volleyball scholarship after third year nationals!” 

Kuroo grinned. “That’s awesome, kiddo. You play for the team with Bo?” 

Bokuto nodded, clapping Hinata’s shoulder hard enough for him to stumble. “He sure does! Gonna take my place as ace when I’m gone, aren’t you?” 

“Sure am!” The two of them grinned at each other, and Kuroo laughed at the identical manic gleam in their eyes and running a complicated handshake before they returned their attention to the counter.

“I didn’t know you two knew each other.” Bokuto said curiously. 

Kuroo nodded. “Yeah, our schools were close. ‘Fated rivals’. We played at Nationals in my final year and his first.” 

“No way!” Bokuto said, his eyes huge. “We could have met there! What school did you go to?” 

“Nekoma,” he grinned, crooking his fingers like paws like he hadn’t had to in almost three years. He still missed his team. Everyone who he’d known there would have left by now. “I’ll be a cat to the day I die.”

Bokuto laughed out loud. “Yeah, I can see that,” he grinned, “Lanky, sly fucker. I was always bummed out we never got to play you guys, your receives were  _ insane. _ Kenma too?” 

“Wait, Kenma’s here as well?” Hinata said, butting in.

“Sure, he works the same shifts as me. You want me to go find him? He was… right here.” Kuroo frowned as he looked around. His best friend had conspicuously vanished. “Gimme two ticks.” He said, suspicious as he pushed the door that led to the back room. 

Sure enough, Kenma was hovering just behind it. “What are you doing.” He asked him, his voice flat.

“Is he still there?” Kenma asked, peering at the window. Bokuto and Hinata were just about visible, chatting animatedly. 

Kuroo followed his gaze. “Why are you hiding from Hinata? I thought you guys stayed friends?” 

Kenma didn’t answer, refusing to meet his eyes. His cheeks had gone bright red. Kuroo had only seen that expression once before, the first time Kenma had met Akaashi, his ethereally beautiful roommate in first year. The three of them still occasionally met up for coffee to catch up, even if Kenma’s crush was long gone.

“No way.” Kuroo managed a startled laugh. “You got the hots for Chibi-chan!”

He was hit with a freezing cold glare which had stopped having any effect after the age of nine. “Don’t you dare say a word.” Kenma said, and something in his tone made Kuroo stop.

“Fine,” he relented, “But I already told him you work here, so you have to come and say hello, at least. He got all excited and everything.” 

He was already running half a dozen plans to get them together as they re-entered the shop floor. He’d seen the absolute adoration Hinata had used to look at Kenma with back in high school.

“Kenma!” Hinata said, his eyes bright as he saw Kenma. “How come you never said you came here?”

Kuroo stared at Kenma with his eyes narrowed, before leaving him to suffer. The fact that Kenma had never even told Hinata that they went to university in the same place didn’t exactly  _ surprise  _ him, but still…

He had other priorities. “Soooo.” He said, turning to Bokuto. “How was your date with Oikawa?” He’d heard Oikawa’s side of it already; it mainly consisted of a lot of swooning over muscles (very relatable), and a reluctant refusal to ever see him again (not so relatable). 

_ ‘He’s too much like Iwa-chan, if Iwa-chan’s head was completely empty and he wasn't such a brute. It’s rubbing salt in the wound, and frankly you’re a horrible friend. Who should definitely buy me milk bread to make up for your crimes.’  _

Kuroo could kind of see where the comparisons had come from; he’d thought it would make Bokuto a good match for Oikawa. Maybe it had been a little too good of a match.

“Oh, super fun!” Bokuto said, his face lighting up. “We had coffee and then went to the carnival in the evening. I thought I’d be winning him a bunch of prizes, but he refused to let me win  _ anything. _ We figured we’d be better as friends though. The two of us would just keep pushing each other. And he’s maybe a bit too smart? Not  _ too _ smart, but smart in more of a sneaky way. He’s too hard to read.” 

Kuroo sighed dramatically. “You don’t make my life easy, do you?” He complained, starting on Bokuto’s drink with no prompting. Bokuto was in a good mood, so it was a mocha kind of day. 

“Wait,” Hinata said, butting in and tugging on Bokuto’s arm.  _ "Kuroo-san _ is -” 

“Working really hard, Hinata, don’t interrupt.” Bokuto finished hurriedly. Kuroo looked at him oddly, but didn’t say anything. He felt like he was missing something. 

“So, of the dates so far,” he started, changing tack, “You like tall, smart, a little wild but not too much, funny, self-aware, competitive, easy to read -” 

“Not  _ too  _ easy to read,” Bokuto said, “I like a bit of a challenge. But Oikawa was kind of…”

“Two-faced?” Kuroo supplied with a smile. Bokuto nodded. 

“I didn’t want to say it! He’s your friend!” 

Kuroo waved a hand carelessly. “Say what you like about him, he’s a dick.” He hummed as he pushed the lid onto the salted caramel mocha. “You have pretty demanding criteria though.” Inspiration hit him. It might not be Bokuto’s dream man, but it would probably fix a different problem. “Ok, this next guy -”

Kenma tugged on his sleeve, looking annoyed. “We had an idea.” He said, his face softening as he looked at Hinata. Who was looking nothing short of devious. 

“We’re going to the movies at the weekend!” The redhead announced. 

Kuroo exchanged a glance with Bokuto, who seemed to be going bright red. “Um. Well done?” 

“With you two.” Kenma supplied, rolling his eyes. 

Kuroo narrowed his eyes. Cute as that sounded - he didn’t really want to get in the way of what sounded like it could be a date under the right circumstances. He’d seen the way Kenma’s face softened around Hinata back in high school, and it was  _ wonderful. _ Hinata brought Kenma out of a shell that he'd grown too comfortable with around Kuroo. There was no way he'd do anything to jeopardise getting in between them. And he didn't really want to give Kenma an excuse not to talk to Hinata either. 

Besides, he didn’t know what he would do with himself if he had to spend time with Bokuto outside of the walls of the coffee shop. What if he realised Kuroo was really a desperate loser who ended up pushing anyone who he started to get close to? Nah, Nekoma Coffee was a safe space. No need to risk anything with someone who was quickly becoming one of his best friends - and crash Kenma's first chances at romance in over three years. 

Kenma was looking at him somewhat desperately. If Kuroo was a better person, he might have taken pity on him.

“Don’t you want some time to catch up, just the two of you?” He said, raising an eyebrow at Kenma, trying to be subtle.

Bokuto looked relieved across the counter. “Yeah,” he said bluntly, “Why’d you want us to crash your date?” 

Subtle apparently was not the order of the day, but that had never been one of the reasons he’d liked Bokuto to start with.

Hinata was staring at his teammate with huge eyes, his lips pressed into a hard, desperate line as he tried to communicate something. Something that Bokuto seemed to be refusing to see. 

“Gotta go, see you at practice, Hinata!” He said, grabbing his drink from Kuroo’s outstretched hand and practically  _ running  _ for the door. 

“Huh. That was weird.” Kuroo said, staring after him. The air seemed a bit emptier without Bokuto smiling at him. "So, you two are going to the movies, huh? Sounds cute."

“Oh my  _ god." _ Hinata said, looking at Kenma with huge eyes.

“Yeah.” Kenma replied tiredly. “Exactly.” 

*

**_Kuroo_ **

_ Hey man, I heard you and Oikawa are on a break. You doing alright? Wanna go out for drinks or anything? _

**_Iwa-chan_ **

_ Yeah, bit rough but I’ll live. He really fucked me off this time. Drinks would be cool, have a good catchup. You free on Friday? _

**_Kuroo_ **

_ Friday’s good! I’ll get Daichi on board, reunite the dad squad >:3  _

_ Had another question for you _

_ How do you fancy a date? _

**_Iwa-chan_ **

_ With you? I’ll pass _

**_Kuroo_ **

_ WHATS WRONG WITH ME.  _

_ But no, a good friend of mine, he’s drama free, very single and very nice to look at ;)) _

**_Iwa-chan_ **

_ … Do you pimp out all your friends or am I special? _

**_Kuroo_ **

_ You are very special, my dearest Iwaizumi! _

_ But yeah, pretty much all of them.  _

_ * _

By the time Kuroo arrived to his shift on Saturday afternoon, he wanted to die. The hangover from the night before was probably nothing compared to Daichi’s after six jaegerbombs in about five minutes, but it didn’t mean it didn’t feel like his brain was trying to squeeze out through his eye sockets. 

“Oi, Kuroo, you look like shit.” Yaku said helpfully the moment he walked in, and he groaned instead of replying. “You sure you want to work like this? You won’t be a lot of help.” He said, sounding a little doubtful.

Kuroo sighed. “Yeah, gotta get that bread. Gimme two secs, I’ll be back.” He’d be no use lying in bed and feeling sorry for himself. And the thought of seeing Bokuto again was no small motivator to stay upright, even if he’d been noticeably absent since Wednesday.

“One, two!” Yaku called after him as he went to find his apron. “Quit slacking!” 

Saturday afternoons always dragged. It was usually just him and Yaku after lunch, and there was never much of a rush - today was no exception. They weren’t busy on a day when most of the student population were nursing hangovers or catching up on assignments. Ushijima was sat across from a wild-looking redhead in a booth, their hands joined on the table (which was new, he’d need to pester him about that later), but he’d never exactly been the most talkative of Kuroo’s friends. The rest of the traitors were absolutely nowhere to be seen. 

After twelve successive losses at hangman on scraps of napkin, Kuroo finally got fed up, pulling out his phone. Nekomata wouldn’t hold it against him on a day like this. The bell jingled over the door, and he didn’t even bother to look up, snorting at a video of a cat smacking a printer that Kai had sent him. 

“Tetsurou?” 

His eyes flicked up at the familiar sound of his own name, and blood rushed to his head. A face he’d have been happy to never see again stared at him, wide-eyed as he tried to stamp down the urge to just  _ run _ from what had been the safest place he had.

*

**_Yaku-nori_ **

_ 17:32 You left your coat here. You want me to send it with Kenma? _

_ 17:40 Guess you don’t really want to talk.  _

_ 17:42 Btw, told Nekomata sort of what happened, his name’s been put on the blacklist to stop him coming back. So you have no reason to keep slacking xo _

_ 17:43 (Hope you feel better soon) _

**\--**

**_Ken-doll <3 _ **

_ 18:01 Yaku said Daishou showed up. You good? _

_ 18:23 Kuro?  _

**\--**

**_Brat_ **

_ 19:12 Are you coming out at any point or do I need to make you eat (´･(´･(´･(´･(´･(´･д･`) ･`)･`)･`)･`)･`) _

**_Tetsu-chan_ **

_ 19:15 I’m fine.  _

_ 19:17 (Is there still packet ramen) _

**_Brat._ **

_ 19:17 Not anymore there isn’t! So you have to come socialise if you want to eat (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و _

**_Tetsu-chan_ **

_ 19:18 Guess I’m moving onto a toenail diet.  _

**_Brat._ **

_ 19:18 Disgusting.  _

_ 19:18 Kuro-chan, I will break down your door. And then you’ll have to hear about my broken fingernails. You really want that? (((￣へ￣井) _

**_Tetsu-chan_ **

_ 19:18 Le sigh. _

_ 19:18 Fine.  _

_ 19:19 Don’t mention my face please. _

**_Brat._ **

_ 19:20 I will! It’s my favourite face ༼♥ل͜♥༽ _

**_Tetsu-chan_ **

_ 19:20 I’m telling Iwaizumi _

_ 19:21 The fuck is that kaomoji _

**_Brat._ **

_ 19:22 If you feel well enough to mock me, you are well enough to be smothered with love.  _

_ 19:22 Hopefully it will kill you. _

_ 19:22 Iwa-chan has clearly moved on, since he went on a date earlier today.  _

**_Tetsu-chan_ **

_ 19:23 ...Shitty romcom and pizza night? _

**_Brat._ **

_ 19:24 This is why you’re now my favourite ～(^з^)-♡ _

**\--**

**_Ken-doll <3 _ **

_ 19:32 Do you need me to come over? _

**_No._ **

_ 19:32 No, I’m fine.  _

**_Ken-doll <3 _ **

_ 19:35 Im on my way _

**_No._ **

_ 19:35 nO, Kenma, seriously, I’m fine. _

_ 19:35 Oikawa's got it covered.  _

_ 19:37 We're having a wonderful time not talking about it.  _

**_Ken-doll <3 _ **

_ 19:40 I'll be round tomorrow.  _

_ 19:41 Am I allowed to hack his bank account this time? _

**_No._ **

_ 19:42 NO KENMA.  _

_ 19:45 (<3) _

**_Ken-doll <3 _ **

_ 19:46 ew. _

_ 19:48 (...<3) _

**\--**

**_Teruteruteru_ **

_ 21:34 Heard your shitty ex showed up. You wanna get really really drunk and break stuff with me?  _

**_*fart sound*_ **

_ 21:45 Oh god yes.  _

_ 21:48 Oikawa’s coming too _

**_Teruteruteru_ **

_ 21:50 niCE _

**\--**

(Sunday)

**\--**

**_Ken-doll <3_ **

_ 09:19 I'm at your door.  _

**_No._ **

_ 09:19 uunnnnngghhhhhhhh _

**\--**

**_Dadchi_ **

_ 11:01 Hey, I'm here if you want to talk.  _

**_Pain in my ass_ **

_ 11:04 Awh, you're such a dad ;)))  _

**_Dadchi_ **

_ 11:07 I take it back.  _

**_Pain in my ass_ **

_ 11:08 :(((( _

**_Dadchi_ **

_ 11:08 But seriously, Kuroo.  _

**_Pain in my ass_ **

_ 11:10 I know, man. Thanks.  _

_ 11:11 Just don't really feel like talking.  _

**\--**

**_Ushiwaka 💪_ **

_ 14:20 Semi said you were feeling unwell. Did you know that the water boatman can create 99db of sound by rubbing its penis across its abdomen?  _

**_Tetsurou_ **

_ 14:23 HAH NO FUCKING WAY _

_ 14:23 thanks ushi, that made me smile _

**_Ushiwaka 💪_ **

_ 14:25 I'm glad to hear it. Would further animal genitalia facts continue to make you smile?  _

**_Tetsurou_ **

_ 14:28 Hell yeah, buddy, keep em coming  _

**_Ushiwaka 💪_ **

_ 14:29 Bokuto messaged me earlier asking if you were well. What should I tell him? _

**_Tetsurou_ **

_ 14:34 Just say I’m sick. _

**_Ushiwaka 💪_ **

_ 14:35 But you are not sick. You wish me to lie? _

**_Tetsurou_ **

_ 14:37 Yes. Exactly that. _

**_Ushiwaka 💪_ **

_ 14:38 Your replies seem more curt than usual. Have I caused offence? _

**_Tetsurou_ **

_ 14:39 No. _

_ 14:39 No sorry, Ushi. Bokuto just doesn’t know anything about what happened, and I like it that way.  _

**_Ushiwaka 💪_ **

_ 14:40 I see. _

_ 14:42 Did you know female kangaroos have three vaginas? _

**_Tetsurou_ **

_ 14:43 Beautiful 😍 _

**\--**

**_Iwa-chan_ **

_ 18:33 So i have a question for you _

**_Kuroo_ **

_ 18:35 Fire away hot stuff _

**_Iwa-chan_ **

_ 18:36 Did you set me and Oikawa up with the same person deliberately or was it a happy accident _

**_Kuroo_ **

_ 18:36 Awh damn, who spilled >:( _

__ **_Iwa-chan_ **

_ 18:37 You're a menace to polite society.  _

**_Kuroo_ **

_ 18:37 But…..?  _

**_Iwa-chan_ **

_ 18:37 …  _

_ 18:39 Oikawa texted, saying a date he'd been on made him remember why he was head over heels for me. And he apologised.  _

_ 18:39 And then I said smth similar after hanging with a guy you'd set me up with.  _

_ 18:40 And then we realised  _

_ 18:40 YOU SET BOTH OF US UP WITH BOKUTO _

**_Kuroo_ **

_ 18:41 Ok hear me out _

_ 18:41 It worked?  _

_ 18:42 And you got the delight of Bokuto in your lives _

_ 18:42 So really you should be thanking me _

**_Iwa-chan_ **

_ 18:43 I hate you sometimes _

_ 18:43 Sneaky, scheming little shitbag _

**_Kuroo_ **

_ 18:43 Awh :)))))  _

_ 18:45 Love you too Iwa <3 _

**_Iwa-chan_ **

_ 18:45 Eat my ass  _

_ 18:45 You're so lucky Bokuto is such a charmer _

_ 18:48 (Thank you.)  _

**_Kuroo_ **

_ 18:49 <3 _

**_Iwa-chan_ **

_ 18:50 You ever gonna tell Bokuto how you feel?  _

_ 18:51 Because he mentioned you like. Sixteen times on our date.  _

_ 18:51 That usually means something _

**_Kuroo_ **

_ 18:53 Wow, Iwa-chan, didn't know you were trilingual, what does that mean?  _

**_Iwa-chan_ **

_ 18:54 Call me Iwa-chan again and I'll throw you into the sun.  _

_ 18:55 Will take that as a strong no. _

**_Kuroo_ **

_ 18:58 Smart boy ;)  _

**_\--_ **

(Monday)

**\--**

**_Kai, LOML, best friend and most beautiful man in the world_ **

_ 8:56 You coming into class today? _

_ 8:59 Kuroo? _

_ 13:02 Ok, I guess that was a no. I’ve got the notes when you want them. _

**\--**

**_Ken-doll <3_ **

_ 14:10 Bokuto looks pathetic  _

_ 14:12 Please come in _

_ 14:15 KURO _

_ 14:15 HES ASKING WHERE YOU ARE _

_ 14:16 PUT THE MAN OUT OF HIS MISERY.  _

_ 14:17 OR AT LEAST PUT HIM OUT OF MY MISERY _

**_No._ **

_ 14:21 Putting a hit on you as we speak _

**_Ken-doll <3_ **

_ 14:30 Why am i even friends with you _

**_No._ **

_ 14:34 Because you LOVE me.  _

**_Ken-doll <3_ **

_ 14:39 Try again.  _

**_No._ **

_ 14:43 Because my shrivelled existence makes you feel better about your own.  _

**_Ken-doll <3_ **

_ 14:45 Better. _

_ 14:46 I told him you had diarrhoea.  _

**_No._ **

_ 14:49 The assassin should be with you within thirty minutes.  _

**_Ken-doll <3_ **

_ 15:02 Thank god.  _

**\--**

**_Kai, LOML, best friend and most beautiful man in the world_ **

_ 16:25 Bokuto says you weren’t at the coffee shop again? _

_ 16:28 He looks super down, should I tell him anything?  _

**_Groblin_ **

_ 17:30 Please don’t. _

_ 17:32 Can I grab the notes tomorrow? _

**_Kai, LOML, best friend and most beautiful man in the world_ **

_ 17:35 Glad you’re alive _

_ 17:35 Of course :) _

_ 17:36 Are you back at work tomorrow? _

**_Groblin_ **

_ 17:38 Yeah _

**_Kai, LOML, best friend and most beautiful man in the world_ **

_ 17:40 I'll come at the end of your shift and we can have a study date back at yours? Get takeaway?  _

**_Groblin_ **

_ 17:41 Kai. _

_ 17:41 I'd fucking die for you.  _

**\--**

**_Sexy sexy Sakusa_ **

_ 20:03 You didn't come to debate club. Are you well?  _

**_Kuroo Tetsurou_ **

_ 20:07 Awh, you missed me ;3 _

**_Sexy sexy Sakusa_ **

_ 20:08 Hardly.  _

_ 20:08 But Lev took over your argument and spent twenty minutes trying to convince everyone that incest is morally ok because the babies could be really, really,  _ **_really_ ** _ good-looking.  _

_ 20:08 Please tell me you could have done better.  _

**_Kuroo Tetsurou_ **

_ 20:09 I taught him everything I know 😌 _

**_Sexy sexy Sakusa_ **

_ 20:10 Why am I even surprised?  _

_ 20:10 Please return for the next one. I miss intelligent conversation. _

**\--**

It was Tuesday when Kuroo finally pulled himself together enough to go back to work. Kenma barely glanced at him, a quick nod, but Kuroo could see the relief as he stood a little straighter at the counter and sighed a little more dramatically with every coffee order he took. 

"Did you miss me?" He leered at Tsukishima with his usual glee as his friend scoffed and shoved his glasses up his nose, five minutes ahead of the rush as usual. 

"Nobody misses your shitty coffee." Tsukishima said. But the brief smile he gave Kuroo when he handed him his drink said everything. 

The hustle of the rush took the last edge off his nerves, and he stopped turning to check who'd come through the door around half three. 

_ He's not coming back. He's not coming back. Not coming back. He's been blacklisted.  _ He repeated to himself over and over. He hadn't seen Daishou since the end of second year, and he'd thought that his ex had been equally happy to keep the distance between them. Things had just been… tense by the end, to put it lightly. It had been a nasty surprise to see him, it had thrown him for a loop, but he'd be prepared next time. It wasn’t like Daishou could do anything to him in the middle of a busy coffee shop anyway.

The door jingled just before four as the shop was beginning to empty of the main rush. 

Kuroo turned with a smile, wiping his hands. And paused. 

Bokuto stared back at him.

"Hi." Kuroo said awkwardly. Their usual ease seemed to have evaporated over the weekend. 

"Hey." Bokuto waved pointlessly. They stared at each other for a long beat. "Your friends all said you were sick." 

Kuroo smiled, a lump in his throat. "You been checking up on me?" 

Bokuto scratched at the back of his head, looking to the side. His face was faintly pink.. "No one else here makes coffee that I like drinking," he said, and Kuroo felt a surge of affection for Bokuto and his dorky, handsome face and not really knowing how to say he cared with words but managing it anyway. 

"Well, lucky I'm back then, isn't it." He said with a little smile, doodling a winky cat face on the cardboard cup. 

"Kuroo." He looked up at Bokuto and his big, happy eyes, warming all the way through. He'd missed him more than he'd thought he would, Bokuto Koutarou and the way he knew Kuroo's work schedule and always forgot his own, his bad dye job which never changed and had to be deliberate to look like that and would be _god awful_ on anyone else, the way he never even bothered to look at the boards anymore, looking expectantly hopeful at Kuroo whenever he came in. Who’d noticed when he wasn't there. Who'd cared to try and find him. "I missed you." 

He smiled wider, looking away. His face was a little too hot, but that was ok. Just as long as it never went further than this. Bokuto could do so much better than him and his fucked up heart. 

"I missed you too, Bo." He said, turning to find the apple syrup for the apple turnover frappuccino he'd planned out just for the next time Bokuto came in so he could try something different. And he made sure to fix Bokuto’s look of delight as he tasted it in his mind, something warm to hold on to for the next spell of cloudy weather. Bokuto pushed the clouds away like nothing else.

*

"I never told you about my date with Iwaizumi, did I?" Bokuto told him a couple of days later. 

"Don't need to." Kuroo said, smearing a little blob of whipped cream on his nose. He smiled as Bokuto went cross-eyed as he tried to lick it off. "Iwa texted me after."

"Oh?" Bokuto gave up trying to lick his own nose, wiping the cream off and sucking it off his fingers in a motion that was completely distracting. "Only good things?" 

Kuroo laughed, easy and bright. "Yeah, he was very complimentary. Right up to the point he said you made him realise he needed to get his old boyfriend back." He laughed harder at the look of indignation he received, grabbing onto the counter.

"Hey! It wasn't like that!" Bokuto protested. “We make great friends, there was just none of that spark." He stared at Kuroo meaningfully when he didn't agree.  "You know, the  _ spark." _

“Please elaborate.” Kuroo said, resisting the urge to smile. “Tell me more about this  _ spark.” _

“Uggghhhh, Kurooooo,” Bokuto whined. “When you meet someone new and you just. You want to put a hand behind their neck to pull them just a little bit closer because it sucks that they’re far away? And you start thinking of ways to make them smile and laugh? Reasons to be around them! And you want to learn more things about them, and go out of your  _ way  _ to see the way they look at you, and wonder what they look like when they wake up in the morning and how they sleep?” He gestured wildly. “The  _ spark!”  _

“Well aren’t you the romantic.” Kuroo said, spraying a mountain of whipped cream on the top of Bokuto’s drink. Maybe he might get another blob of it on his nose and Kuroo could watch him try and lick it off again. “I think you’re thinking too hard, bro. Either you want to kiss them, or you don’t.” 

“Nope.” Bokuto shook his head, his eyes closed. “It’s not that straight forward. No wonder you’re still single if that’s how you decide on dates.”

“Oof,” he said, clutching a hand to his chest, pretending that hadn’t hurt. “If you wait through every date for your elusive sparkle, Bo, you’ll never find anyone.”

“Sometimes it doesn’t have to come on a date,” Bokuto said, staring at him. Like he was trying to communicate something with the force of his gaze. “Sometimes it just smacks you in the face from nowhere.” 

Kuroo didn’t know how to reply to that, completely caught in Bokuto’s eyes. “Nowhere, huh.” He repeated quietly. Bokuto really had come out of nowhere. But this wasn't a spark. Kuroo didn't sparkle with people anymore. This was all Bokuto and his irresistible magnetism. The situation unfolded slowly around him, coming back down to the present. Maybe he panicked a little. He giggled, “Ha, bro, are we about to -”

Bokuto snorted, blinking away and breaking the spell. “You know what I mean.” He rolled his eyes, taking his drink and licking at the cream. It was grossly compelling to watch.

“Oh, meant to tell you!” Kuroo remembered suddenly. “I found your next date. He’s tall - taller than you again!  _ I _ think he’s funny, he’s smart, down to Earth, super hot. And so, _ so _ clean.”

There was a hacking sound as Bokuto choked on the whipped cream. “He’s - he’s  _ clean?" _ He laughed, wheezing. “Who the fuck do you describe as  _ clean?” _

Kuroo raised an eyebrow. “You’ll understand. You interested?” 

*

**_Kuroo Tetsurou_ **

_ Hey, sexy! Got you a date ;))) _

**_Sexy sexy Sakusa_ **

_ You did  _ _** what.** _

*

“Kuroo,” Daichi said slowly as they left the library after their weekly Monday study session, “Why exactly are you so intent on fixing Bokuto up with a date?” 

Kuroo knew what Daichi was getting at. He also knew that he had no intention of answering him properly. “Because everyone deserves to be happy.” He said with a smile.

“Don’t smile like that. It’s creepy.” Daichi frowned at him as they headed towards the little kiosk just outside the library building. “It just seems a bit weird. You’ve set him up on how many dates now? And you clearly -”

“I’m going to stop you right there before you make a terrible misunderstanding.” Kuroo interrupted, throwing an arm over Daichi’s shoulder. He knew how much he hated being reminded of the height difference. “And I believe it’s been five dates now. Six when he’s had dinner with Sakusa.” 

“You sent him on a blind date with  _ Sakusa?" _ Daichi stared at him, disapproving as he shrugged him off. “Sakusa Kiyoomi? I thought you said Bokuto was your friend?” 

“What’s wrong with Sakusa!” He protested, fishing his wallet from his pocket for the two polystyrene cups of hot chocolate which had been their tradition since first year. And it was definitely his week to pay. “He’s tall, pretty, clever,  _ clean -" _

“Ok, you have to stop using that as a selling point for him,” Daichi groaned. “‘Clean’ is not a compliment.”

“It is to Sakusa.” Kuroo said with a grin. “Plus the guy's like a beautiful, smouldering, artificial pine forest. How else would you describe him?” 

In his head, he did doubt the combination of Sakusa and Bokuto. He’d met Sakusa at debate club in second year, and the med student was smart and stubborn enough to actually provide a good match. They’d exchanged numbers after their third debate ended in a deadlock, and Kuroo still sometimes went to pick his brains on biology. He was dry, clever, biting - and he  _ was  _ funny, even if not many other people often got his humour. But he was also stubborn, unyielding, difficult when he wanted to do something and impossible when he didn’t. Boktuo was.... None of those things. Bokuto was fun, free, easy like breathing. 

And very likely to show up covered in dirt and a sheepish grin.

Maybe it would be a case of opposites attract?

“Besides!” Kuroo pointed out, thanking the vendor with an easy smile as they turned away, handing one of the little plastic cups to Daichi, “Last two dates I set Bo up on ended with everyone’s favourite power couple back together. Oikawa  _ finally _ stopped nagging at me to do my laundry. Who knows what good the union of Bokuto and Sakusa will bring to the cosmic balance of the universe?” 

“Quit talking like a Carl Sagan documentary,” Daichi grumbled, hip-checking him hard enough to make him stumble. “You know damn well you’re doing this to stop Bokuto asking you out instead.” 

Kuroo glared at him. “That’s stupid. You’re stupid. I have no idea what you’re talking about.” 

“Kuroo.” Daichi was giving him the stern dad glare. “You deserve someone to make you happy too.” 

“I am happy, Dad.” He rolled his eyes, marching towards the labs for his afternoon class. He was. Daishou had fucked with his head. He was much, much happier on his own. And any potential partners were better off without him as well.

“I’m serious, young man!” Daichi yelled after him, a smile in his voice. Kuroo knew he could never stay mad with him for long. “When are you going to fix yourself up with a date?” 

Kuroo waved flippantly over his shoulder, smiling to himself. He didn’t want a date. Especially not with Bokuto.

Bokuto could do a million times better than him. 

*

“You gotta hide me,” Bokuto whimpered the next afternoon, shoving past the queue in the coffee shop and staring at Kuroo pitifully. He seemed oblivious to the long line of scowling customers glaring at him. 

And hell, Kuroo couldn’t say no to those big golden eyes. He was a sucker for kind eyes.

“Get behind here, through that door,” he directed, an eyebrow raised. “I get off in ten minutes. You better explain yourself.” 

It turned out he didn’t need to wait that long at all for an explanation. He was chatting with Miya - or more accurately, laughing at Miya’s terrible decision to get a nipple piercing and his resultant whining - when all the warmth flew out of the coffee shop. 

And Sakusa Kiyoomi stormed in, enough cold fury pouring off him that Kuroo didn’t need to see the bottom half of his face under his mask. 

“Where is he?” He asked Kuroo coldly, polite even in his rage as he stood the full metre away from Miya on the customer side of the counter.

Kuroo stared at him blankly. “He being…?” 

“The idiot you set me up on a date with,” Sakusa hissed, drawing his mask down under his chin to get his words out clearly. “Bokuto, have you seen him?” 

“Uhhhh,” Kuroo stumbled out, mind whirling. “No? Why?” 

Sakusa was quickly turning a deep shade of red. “He showed up twenty minutes late, and then asked me why I was carrying… lubricant,” he gritted out like it pained him, “In a hand sanitiser bottle. Loudly. In the middle of the restaurant. Did you think for one second that he’d actually -” 

“Pffft,” Miya snickered, “Yer a bit of a prude, ain’t ya?” 

Kuroo felt his jaw drop as Sakusa’s jaw slammed shut. A tiny muscle twitched near his neck as he turned, achingly slowly, to stare at Miya Atsumu. Kuroo vaguely wondered what sort of flowers his friend would want on his coffin.

“What. Did you just say to me?” Sakusa asked slowly, his voice emotionless. He seemed stuck staring at Miya’s mouth.

Miya grinned lazily, stepping into Sakusa’s space. Sakusa didn’t step back. “I said,” he repeated in a bad impersonation of the Tokyo dialect, “You. Are a bit of a prude, aren’t you?” 

Sakusa seemed to come to his senses, taking a step back. Miya’s eyes gleamed. “I don’t know you, and I don’t care what you think.” He turned a deliberate shoulder on Miya, staring at Kuroo. “Don’t ever think about setting me up on a date again.” He said, lifting his chin. 

“Sure.” He agreed, nodding. “I’ll tell Bo not to call you, I guess?” 

“Hol’ up.” Miya narrowed his eyes. “‘Bo’? As in Bokuto Koutarou?” 

Sakusa looked at him sharply. “You know him?” 

“Yeah,” Miya said, staring at Kuroo. “You set him up on a date with me as well.” 

Kuroo shrugged with a playful smile. “I am a devoted, good friend. You’re all lucky to have me.” 

“I am going to plan your murder in exquisite detail.” Sakusa promised him, pulling his mask back over his nose. “Do me a favour and find someone competent to replace you in debate first.” 

"Fuck's sake, I even have to plan for my own murder now?" He called as Sakusa flipped him the middle finger. 

With an elegant swirl, Sakusa was gone, leaving half the people in the store staring after him. 

“Hot damn, how have you never introduced me to him before?” Miya asked, grinning as he stared at the door Sakusa had left through. 

“I don’t know if you noticed, but he isn’t the friendliest.” Kuroo said, pulling the staff door open and dragging out a reluctant Bokuto. “Why, you interested?” 

“Don’t do it,Tsum-Tsum,” Bokuto said, his eyes glued to the door - less in interest, more in fear, and when had Miya Atsumu become  _ Tsum-Tsum  _ to Bokuto? “He could kill you with a glance.” 

“I could be inta that,” Miya mused, before taking his drink with a horrible wiggle of his eyebrows. “Literally. Ya have his number, Tets?” 

“Did you not hear him when he said not to set him up on any more dates?” Kuroo said, raising an eyebrow. “Do you  _ want  _ me to die?” 

Miya winked at him. “Don’ make me answer that. But if ya give me his number, I can set the date up. Ya don’ have ta do anythin’.” 

“Nope.” Kuroo shook his head firmly. “No can do. But I’ll ask him. No promises.” He warned as Miya looked at him hopefully. 

“Good enough fer me!” He said, retying his scarf. “Catch yer later, Bokkun!”

Kuroo stared at Bokuto curiously. “Bokkun?” He asked, and Bokuto smiled. 

“Yeah, we kept chatting after that awful first date. Turns out we make pretty good friends!” He said. Kuroo didn’t doubt it. Bokuto could make friends with a forest bear after he’d shaved it bald. 

“What happened with Sakusa?” He said instead, pulling at the strings of his apron. Kenma gave him a filthy look, still an hour left on his own shift. Kuroo might have felt bad once, if he didn’t know that Hinata usually dropped by for the last hour of Kenma’s Friday shifts. The two hadn’t said anything about going official, but Hinata was a firm fixture in Kenma's life. And they held hands when they left the coffee shop together - potentially the sweetest thing Kuroo had ever seen. Kenma was just being a piss baby, frowning at Kuroo like that. “I figured he’d be perfect for you!”

Bokuto followed him to the quiet corner booth, sighing dramatically. "I mean sure, tall, dark, _ really  _ hot, but I thought you said he was funny?" 

"Eh, I believe I said 'funny to me',” Kuroo corrected. "Subtle difference." 

"He wouldn't know a joke if it spiked him in the face with a volleyball! Although he said he played back in high school which was cool. I get what you mean about clean though." Bokuto mused. 

"Right?!" Kuroo said, leaning across the table, his eyes wide. "Smouldering, sexy pine forest!" 

"Exactly!" Bokuto grinned. He considered Kuroo for a moment as his grin slipped away. Kuroo could almost feel the question approaching. 

He was sick of running from it. 

"Dude. Why are  _ you  _ single?" 

And there was just. _ Something _ about the look in golden eyes, glowing in the light of the sun settling across campus that was just too easy to talk to. 

He twisted his mouth. Bokuto didn't need the whole story. He'd understand, wouldn't push him for more. In a weird sort of way, Kuroo felt like he owed him more of the truth. Friendship level up or whatever. 

"My ex, he um. He was kind of shitty when we were a thing. We'd been together since the end of high school but we were always arguing. I just didn't think it was weird, it was how we were, you know? Couldn’t agree on anything." He laughed, fiddling with his hands. "Took six months of nagging from my friends and a black eye at the end of last year before I figured enough was enough and told him to get fucked. Just not really good at relationships, I guess. Haven't really looked to get back into one since." 

Nobody else needed to deal with his bullshit.

A hand closed around his, stopping him fidgeting, his thoughts running to a stop. Bokuto was staring at him with a frown. "I don't think it's you who's bad at them. He sounds like he was a piece of shit." He said, and Kuroo laughed again, a little more easily, Bokuto's hand towing him back to Earth. 

"That's what all my friends said too," he said ruefully. "But yeah. I'm. Not too hot on relationships." 

Bokuto nodded thoughtfully. "You deserve the nicest guy on Earth. Someone who's gonna treat you like stardust." He said, his eyes drifting out the window with a faraway look on his face. 

_ Lie.  _ Kuroo's mind helpfully supplied, but he shrugged it off, enjoying the calm that came with studying Bokuto's face instead, the soothing warmth of his hand. Storing the expression to still his rippling thoughts. 

*

**_Pain in my ass_ **

_ Sooooooo _

_ How would you react  _

_ If i told you _

**_Dad-chi_ **

_ No.  _

**_Pain in my ass_ **

_ I haven't said it yet!!!!!  _

_ >:(((( _

**_Dad-chi_ **

_ I'm not going on a date with Bokuto.  _

**_Pain in my ass_ **

_ DAICHI PLEASE _

_ YOU'RE THE BEST PERSON I KNOW _

_ GOTTA SAVE THE BEST UNTIL LAST  _

**_Dad-chi_ **

_ You smarmy crapbag.  _

**_Pain in my ass_ **

_ Is that a yeeesss??  _

**_Dad-chi_ **

_ Why am I still friends with you?  _

**_Pain in my ass_ **

_ Because I make your life objectively better :3 _

**_Dad-chi_ **

_ We both know, OBJECTIVELY, that that's a lie.  _

**_Pain in my ass_ **

_ :( _

_ You owe me a favour?  _

**_Dad-chi_ **

_ … What are we doing on the date _

**_Pain in my ass_ **

_ :))  _

*

There's a first time for everything. And for the first time in all the time Kuroo had known Bokuto, he came back to Nekoma Coffee  _ with _ the date Kuroo had set him up on, the pair of them arguing cheerfully as they came through the door. 

Well. Bokuto was trying to say something, huge gestures and excitement pouring off him. Daichi looked stuck somewhere between amused, bemused and disapproving. 

"That's a whole lot of thinking going on, Stock Father Figure." Kuroo said as they approached the counter. "How was ice skating?" 

"If you were my child, I'd have disowned you." Daichi said without blinking. "Can you kindly tell Bokuto that ice skates with wheels is the worst idea I've ever heard since you suggested putting chilli flakes in your hot chocolate?" 

"Ooh, nice!" Bokuto said, turning to him with a grin. "How did it taste?" 

"Like ash." Kuroo grinned. "The blades are the fastest way those things will move, dude, you lose less energy from excess movement. Plus, wheels would have no friction and you'd break your legs." 

"But less friction is good! You'd go way faster!" Bokuto pointed out. Daichi sighed, but Kuroo could see his smile. So they’d had a good time.

"What would really help with speed," he mused, "Is some sort of propulsion thing. Like sticking bottle rockets to the sides of the skates." 

"Oh, for…" Daichi muttered, burying his face in his hands. "How are you two alive after knowing each other for so long?" 

"I'm feeding off his youthful energy. He'll only find out when it's too late." Kuroo said, winking at Bokuto. 

"You can feed off me anytime, catboy." Bokuto said with a massive grin. "Back in a second, I gotta take a whizz." 

"So?" Kuroo asked when Bokuto had vanished with a pair of finger guns. "What'd you think?" 

Daichi stared at him. Hard stared, the sort of look which he hadn’t pulled out since Kuroo had suggested trying to cook eggs in a toaster. "Are you blind. As in, honest to god, get your eyes tested, shouldn't be driving,  _ do you even have eyes, _ blind." 

"No idea what you mean." He replied, getting Daichi's regular flat white ready while Kenma took his payment. He could feel his friend's eyes burning into his back. "Tell me about your date."

"Bokuto's a really great guy, and we had a great time." Daichi replied, sounding exasperated, "But he's not really my type. And I don't think I'm his, either." 

"Don't be dumb," Kuroo scoffed, finishing off the drink and pondering what he could make Bokuto. "You're everyone's type. Who wouldn't like you?" 

"I could ask you the same question," he muttered, taking the cup as Bokuto reappeared with his easy smile. 

"Hey, my guys!" He beamed. "What are we talking about?" 

"Your date," Kuroo said, glaring at Daichi when he opened his mouth. "Dad-man won't tell me anything." 

"Ah, so he didn't tell you I kicked his ass at ice skating then?" Bokuto grinned, leaning across the counter conspiratorially. 

"How can you even kick someone's ass at -" Daichi threw his hands up in surrender. "Never mind."

"By being better than them, I'd guess." Kuroo said with a toothy grin. "Do I need to defend your honour, Daichi? Knock him down a peg?" 

"Oh, you think you could beat me?" Bokuto asked, his eyes sparkling, and Kuroo was many things, but someone who backed down was not one of them. 

"I don't just think it," he said, narrowing his eyes, "I  _ know _ it." 

"I was born on the ice, toothbrush, you're going  _ down." _

Kuroo scoffed. "I've been having skating lessons since I was five. I am one with the ice, it runs in my veins. You really wanna do this?" 

Bokuto tilted his head challengingly, a row of teeth appearing in his smile. "Lot of talk, hot stuff. You wanna get on the ice and back any of this up?" 

"Much as I hate to interrupt this," Daichi said smoothly before Kuroo could say anything at all, "I have to get to class. Bokuto, I'll text you later?" 

"Sure!" He said, before his eyebrows furrowed. "As friends, right?" 

Daichi huffed with laughter. "Yes. As friends. See you Monday, Kuroo." 

"Not the one, then?" He turned to Bokuto, a weird, niggling sensation in his chest when he caught him staring. 

"Nah. He's so reliable and steady which is hot! Don't get me wrong. Just, you know.” He chewed his lip thoughtfully. “You ever get the feeling Daichi's trying to parent you?" 

Kuroo cackled, the sound bouncing around the almost empty shop. Kenma scowled at the loud noise, making a point of turning up the volume on his gameboy. "Yeah, all the time." He found his marker, doodling the first kanji of Bokuto's name on the cup with a wide-eyed little owl. "It's in his blood." 

"So, I was thinking," he said as Kuroo turned to brew the coffee. 

"Uh oh," he hummed, "Sounds like a bad idea for you."

"Shut uuupp!" Bokuto whined. "I was thinking -”

But Kuroo never found out what Bokuto was thinking as the door clattered open once again. His hands went cold. Some people never learnt a thing. He was guilty enough of that himself.

“Tets? Or, I guess, Kuroo now.” Daishou stood with his hands in his pockets and watched him carefully, like Kuroo was about to run again. He looked so  _ sad, _ and Kuroo’s heart panged staring at him. He’d loved him, once. Loved him far past the point he deserved to be loved. “I figured you’d switch your hours to avoid me, but I have to talk to you.” 

“Heh.” He forced the air out of his mouth. “That’s funny. I didn’t think we had anything left to say.” 

“Kuroo?” Bokuto was staring at him, he could feel it, but he knew if he looked at him that the spiker would work it all out straight away. He’d see straight through Kuroo. 

Daishou kept moving forward, almost like he was swaying. It was like the world swayed with him, and Kuroo forced himself to unclench his fingers on the counter. “Hey, come on, at least hear me out.” He said, silky smooth, far too persuasive. Just like he’d always been. “I don’t get why you’re acting like it’s all on me.”

He almost laughed. “I don’t have to act like that, Dai,” he said, his mouth pulling into that side smile that meant nothing. “It  _ was  _ all you.”

“It takes two to fight, Tets,” he said, close enough for Kuroo to make out the gleam of light in his eyes, his eyelashes sweeping across his cheekbones when he blinked, the razor sharp parting of his curtains. “You know me, when we worked, we  _ worked." _

That was the worst part, wasn't it? Because they had worked. There were nights where he missed Daishou so badly it hurt to _breathe_ , and then he felt like the stupidest piece of shit to ever work, because what the hell had Daishou ever done for him? They hadn't worked at all. They'd spent two years tearing each other down, Kuroo had quit the university volleyball team for Daishou, he'd stopped talking to Daichi for three weeks because his boyfriend had been threatened by their friendship, he'd bent over backwards, sideways, inside out to try and make things work and still had to call everything quits because Daishou lost his temper so often that he was just always on eggshells.

The worst part were the low points where he'd _still_ trade the nine bad nights of yelling until his spine was drooping for that one good one where he wasn't alone.

And Kuroo could almost  _ hear _ it, the moment when everything clicked into place for Bokuto, when he realised who Daishou was to Kuroo. The moment when he stood up and turned to face Daishou properly, and even Daishou couldn’t ignore Bokuto when he was right in your face like that. 

His eyes flicked up and down Bokuto dismissively. “Hey. You are?” 

Bokuto glanced back at Kuroo for a moment, golden eyes flicking over his tense face carefully before he reached a decision. 

“Tetsurou’s boyfriend.” He said, straightening up so he was looking down at Daishou, his eyes narrowed dangerously. Kuroo felt his jaw drop, a twist in his stomach at the words that sat unignorable in the air. It was the first time he’d heard Bokuto say his name. (It sounded  _ good.) _ “You are?”

That sent Daishou for a loop, and he took a step back to get out from under Bokuto’s gaze. He looked nervously at Kuroo. “Ha, funny.” He tried to laugh, looking around Bokuto. “Come on, Tets, quit fucking around. You need me, remember?” 

Kuroo looked between them, saw Tsukishima watching cautiously from his table near the door to step in if he needed to, knew that Kenma was somewhere behind his back. He looked at Bokuto, strong and firm and unflinching right where he needed him without trying to take control away from Kuroo. He took his hands off the counter, and levelled Daishou with a cool gaze. “Don’t call me Tets. Actually,” he said, summoning a sneer easily with his friends all around him, “Don’t call me anything. Pretty sure you have a ban in here, don’t you? Want me to call the campus police so you can find out what the inside of a cell looks like?”

“What the hell can he give you that I can’t?” Daishou said, snapping suddenly, all the anger and tension that Kuroo remembered from endless,  _ endless _ fights rearing up like a snake. He shoved Bokuto, nowhere near hard enough to even make him shift, but it was enough to yank Kuroo out of his daze. 

“Don’t fucking touch him!” He said furiously, bursting around the side of the counter. “Get out, you fucking -” 

Daishou stared at him, shocked, before a nasty smile stretched over his face, the savage little one before he threw something back in Kuroo's face. “Nice, Tets. All you took to grow a spine was a new dick up your ass, should have known you hadn’t cheated when you were always such a pussy -”

*

**_GORGEOUS boy_ **

_ Hello Kuroo-san. I heard that you had had a rough couple of months from Kozume-kun, and felt I should reach out. How have you been? Do you wish to talk? _

**_Pain in the ass Kuroo-san_ **

_ AKAASHI!!!  _

_ Hey! Yeah, bit rough but c’est la vie.  _

_ We should definitely catch up soon though _

_ You free next week? _

**_GORGEOUS boy_ **

_ Yes, I would like that. Does Tuesday afternoon sound acceptable? _

**_Pain in the ass Kuroo-san_ **

_ Yissssss _

_ Hey… _

_ Are you still single? _

*****

“How’s your hand?” Kuroo asked, dropping onto the seat across from Bokuto, sliding him a takeaway mug which was  _ definitely  _ on the house. There was a bandage wrapped around his left hand, all his fingers taped up. He’d broken two of them against Daishou’s jaw.

“Eh,” Bokuto shrugged, using the club-like bandage to ruffle Kuroo’s hair with a laugh. “Had worse. Can’t spike with my left hand, but hey, I’m right handed and I don’t need my hand to jump. And he deserved it.” 

“If you hadn’t, I would have.” Kuroo admitted, leaning back and kicking his legs out. “Don’t know what I ever fucking saw in him. Some fucking nerve to touch you as well.” 

“Hey.” Bokuto was frowning,  _ again. _ “You didn’t know what a dickhead he was. And you wanted to see the best in someone you loved. None of this is your fault. That was  _ brave, _ Tetsu.”

The name seemed easy after everything. Believing him was a lot harder. “Whatever. Hopefully he’ll get the message this time.”

“It’s not whatever!” Bokuto protested. “He’s not -” 

“Kou.” Kuroo said, smiling when Bokuto’s protests came to a stumbling halt with the name. “It’s fine. Thank you for standing up for me. You’re the best fake boyfriend a guy could ask for.” 

“...Fake boyfriend?” He said, his voice strangely quiet for how much laughter and noise and light he’d brought into Kuroo’s world over the last couple of months. 

Kuroo grinned. “Yeah, you told Daishou you were my boyfriend, remember? Oh!” He whacked Bokuto’s arm in excitement. “I think I found your perfect man, by the way! Dark hair, very,  _ very _ smart but in a humble, down-to-Earth kind of way, funny, chill, really sweet. Also maybe the prettiest guy I’ve ever met. Tall too, maybe a little shorter than you. He’s  _ perfect." _

Bokuto opened his mouth. Closed it again. Swallowed. “He sounds awesome, Tetsu. Thanks.” The air seemed to have gone out of his sails - or the gel out of his hair, anyway. It was like watching Bokuto deflate before his eyes.

“Hey, dude, what’s up?” He asked, craning his neck to try and look him in the eye. “You don’t have to -”

“I’m just tired.” Bokuto said, dodging the eye contact with an awkward smile. “Don’t stress, bro. Probably just. Need to get to bed or something.” 

Kuroo blinked. “Ok. Sure. See you at the coffee shop tomorrow?”

“Sure, sure.” Bokuto waved, not turning around as he trudged away. “See you, Kuroo.” 

Kuroo became very aware of the freezing December air biting at his nose as he watched Bokuto trudge away from him with the distinct, sinking feeling he’d missed something vitally important.

*

Bokuto’s weird mood seemed to have vanished by the following afternoon when he arrived at Nekoma Coffee, Hinata glued to his side as they arrived from their practise. 

“Hey, Kuroo-senpai!” Hinata yelled, and Kuroo laughed.

“You don’t have to call me senpai anymore, Chibi-chan, you’re dating my best friend,” he said, but Hinata looked at him blankly. 

“You’re always going to be senpai for me though,” he said, his head cocked to the side, and Kenma snorted. “Kenma!” He said with a massive smile, only just noticing his boyfriend where he was hunched behind the till and darting away from Kuroo. 

“You ready for your - hopefully final - date?” Kuroo grinned, turning to Bokuto. Akaashi was due in five minutes, and he ticked every box that Bokuto had. The two would be  _ perfect _ for each other.

“Sure am!” Bokuto said, giving him a thumbs up. “Am I allowed to know anything in advance?” 

“Absolutely nothing. I don’t want you to ruin this one before it’s even begun.” Kuroo winked, doodling on Bokuto’s coffee cup without really thinking about it. He was certain this was going to be the winner, and he was going to start Bokuto off with a winning cup of coffee. 

“I’m not ruining them deliberately,” Bokuto complained, watching Kuroo in a way that was nothing short of fond as he concocted the weirdest drink yet. “What are you making me today?” 

“Ruby hot chocolate with a pump of cinnamon, extra whipped cream, burnt toffee flakes.” He grinned. “I know you like a bunch of flavours, and your face when you get whipped cream on your nose makes me smile, so.” He slid the cup across the counter, watching as Bokuto picked it up and sniffed it curiously. 

“It smells good.” He said, narrowing his eyes. “Akashi would never let me order something like this.” 

“Well, sounds like all the more reason to enjoy it.” Kuroo said, wheedling. “Come on, tell me what you think before your date gets here.” 

Bokuto lifted the cup to his lips. And paused. He pulled it back, examining the side. “Did you draw a heart on this?” He asked, his voice strange. 

“Hmm?” Kuroo said, raising an eyebrow, “No, why would I -” 

Bokuto turned the mug, his eyes flashing, his mouth in a twisty little line. The name  _ Kou _ stared back at him, a little heart wrapped around the kanji. 

“Oh.” He flashed a cheesy grin before he could stutter out something he shouldn't. "It's because you have my heart, dude." 

"Huh." Bokuto said, sounding unconvinced. He looked like he wanted to say something else.

And like the angel saviour that he was, the door to the café swung open, and Akaashi Keiji picked the perfect moment to step inside with a gust of wintery air, loosening the sapphire blue scarf around his neck as he blinked and looked around the coffee shop, nodding as he made eye contact with Kuroo, before -

“AGHAAAASHI!” Bokuto shouted happily, twisting on his seat. “What are you doing here?”

Kuroo blinked. Bokuto… knew Akaashi?

Akaashi didn’t answer for a moment, his eyes narrowing as he looked between the two of them. He took a step closer. “Bokuto-san.” He stared at Kuroo accusingly. “Kuroo-san.” 

That snapped him out of his daze, and Kuroo leaned forward. “You already know him?” 

Bokuto whirled around, his eyes wide. “You know Akashi too?” 

Akaashi sighed. “It’s Ak _ -aa _ -shi, Bokuto-san. Please remember to enunciate.” He said smoothly with a hint of a fond smile hidden in his voice. 

_ Oh. _ Oh, of  _ course  _ that would be his luck. Akaashi Keiji, Kenma’s first roommate, just had to be the famous ‘Akashi’ who basically babysat Bokuto, his best friend from high school. Kuroo had  _ known  _ they’d gone to the same school, but hadn’t thought… 

“What are you doing here?” Bokuto asked him, still that easy, stupid, dopey smile on his face which made Kuroo’s stomach drop. 

“I was asked by Kuroo-san to meet here for a date with one of his friends.” Akaashi turned his steely gaze onto Kuroo; where his fondness for Bokuto was mixed with polite patience, his fondness for Kuroo had  _ always  _ been mixed with exasperation, from the very first day they’d met. Kuroo wouldn’t want it any other way.

He caught his tongue between his teeth a little sheepishly. “Well. Here he is,” he said lamely, doing a jazz hands motion towards Bokuto. This really,  _ really _ wasn’t how he’d seen this happening. He’d kind of thought he’d be attending Bokuto’s wedding day in a month. 

“Ha?” Bokuto managed, his mouth full of whipped cream which he tried to swallow. Akaashi beat him to the punch, looking between the two of them as he put the pieces together.

“Are they serious?” He asked Kenma primly; Hinata had stopped talking so the two of them could watch the shitshow unfold. 

“Yes.” He replied, his eyes dead and remorseless as he stared at Kuroo. “Unfortunately, they’re completely serious.” 

Akaashi turned and looked at Kuroo again, completely unimpressed. “Bokuto-san is the, quote, sweet, dorky, hotter-than the sun sweetheart who brightens your week every time he walks in the room?” 

“Um.” Kuroo said, unable to look at Bokuto as his cheeks started to burn. “You can’t prove I said that.” 

“I can, and I'll prove it in court if I need to.” Akaashi said, turning to Bokuto, somehow looking even  _ more  _ fed up. “Kuroo-san is the barista you’ve been talking about for months now?”

“I don’t know what you -” Bokuto protested, and Kuroo could tell he was probably just as red. Bokuto talked about him? To  _ Akaashi? _ For _ months? _

“The ‘smoking hot, super nice, funny sweetheart who makes me like coffee’ I believe was the first thing you said.” He said, taking no pity on Bokuto’s shrinking form. “Tall, dark and handsome? Very clever and witty? The one with the  _ spark? _ The one with the  _ shoulders?" _

That clearly meant something, as Bokuto physically winced at that last one. “Akaashi, please,” he whined, sounding pathetic, “Tetsu isn’t interested, why do you -”

“For heaven’s sake, Bokuto-san, the two of you are on a  _ first name basis. _ Why do you think he’s not interested?” 

Kuroo swallowed, reeling. Did Bokuto really say all that about him? He couldn’t possibly… 

And he thought  _ Kuroo _ was the one who wasn’t interested? How could Kuroo  _ not _ be interested? “You’re the one who asked me if I knew anyone else hot and single.” He protested weakly. Bokuto looked up to stare at him. His mouth fell open in realisation. 

“I…” he trailed off, wide golden eyes unblinking as he stared at Kuroo. 

“Should I do it, or do you want to?” Kenma said wryly from somewhere to his left. Akaashi just sighed. 

_ Tall. Dark hair. Clever. Funny. Down to earth. Reasons to be around them. Going out of your way to see the way they look at you. _

Maybe Kuroo really was kind of thick. 

“You aren’t looking for a relationship.” Bokuto stated, his voice still in a state of shock.

And yeah, Kuroo hadn’t been. He hadn’t thought that someone like Bokuto could be interested in someone like  _ him _ in a million years. He was twenty one and already had baggage for fuck’s sake. He was pretty happy on his own. 

But then Bokuto walked through the door and cast the clouds away. Bokuto made him laugh so hard he couldn’t breathe, and he could forget that the sun had ever been covered in the first place. Bokuto  _ knew _ him, and still wanted to be around him. And he  _ really _ wanted to be around Bokuto. 

“You said I deserved the nicest person in the world, didn’t you?” He said, trying for a smile. It seemed to work, if the way Bokuto’s eyebrows inched a little higher was any indicator. “You going to back that up, or was that more shitty trash talk?” 

Bokuto looked comically surprised for a whole second, a hilariously slow blink before he returned to his wits. “Oh, dude, I’m going to date you so good,” he said with a massive grin, “You’re gonna be in  _ awe  _ of my awesome dating skills.” 

“Hmm,” Kuroo tapped his chin thoughtfully, a massive smile making his mouth tremble with the effort of holding it back. “Not sure I believe you. You gonna prove it?” 

“You’re so on,” Bokuto said, his eyes properly shining as he looked at Kuroo... the same way he always had. He really  _ was  _ stupid. “Tomorrow at seven? Meet you here after your shift?”

“Hell yeah,” Kuroo agreed, finally letting the smile go, bright, popping bubbles all against his ribcage. It felt like the universe took a sigh of relief. Or maybe it was just Kenma, accompanied with a roll of his eyes. 

Bokuto whooped, leaning forward across the counter with a massive grin. Kuroo let him get closer, in love with the way that the view just seemed to get better with Bokuto in his space. "Hi." He said, his eyes sparkling as he barged straight into Kuroo's space and Kuroo welcomed him in.

He raised an eyebrow, resisting the urge to put a hand on Bokuto's neck to bring him a little closer. "Bro. Are we about to -"

Bokuto waggled his eyebrows ridiculously, pulling a laugh from him effortlessly. "Only if you want to," he said, quieter but just as impactful, watching Kuroo. Letting him make the next move.

He answered with a hand on Bokuto's shoulder, enjoying just how firm he really was in Kuroo's hands as he let his eyes flutter shut, brushing their lips together softly.

Bokuto made a happy little noise, turning his head to deepen the angle, just the right amount of pressure as he cupped his hand around Kuroo's neck, his fingers twisting just at the roots of his hair. He was warm and sweet, and felt so much better against Kuroo's mouth than he could have ever dreamed. Bokuto pulled back for a breath, resting his forehead against Kuroo's. "Ok?" He asked, blinking once, still so close to be overwhelming.

It really was a shame he was still at work, Kuroo wondered, a little dazed. He kind of wanted to see where that had been going. But - he had all the time in the world for that now. "Definitely ok." He agreed, smiling as he forced himself to back away before he tried to sink right into Bokuto's arms.

“Yeah, Bokuto-san!” Hinata yelled, delighted. “That was painful, but you got there!” 

Bokuto made a face before the smile broke back through. “It wasn’t my fault! Dumb, dark and handsome stood there and described himself and still didn’t figure he was my type! I pretended to be his boyfriend!”

“But you asked me to fix you up with someone!” He tried again, trying not to think about the tingling of his lips, and Bokuto stuck his tongue out in response. 

“It’s a really good job you’re smoking hot, Tetsu,” he replied with a wink, and fuck, that was charming. 

“That’s supposed to be my line!” He complained with no heat in it at all as his face caught fire.  _ Bokuto  _ thought  _ he  _ was smoking hot. “Get out my shop, dumbass. And take your smartass friend with you.” 

“Sure thing, babe!” Bokuto said, still smiling like the stars would never stop shining. Kuroo’s heart did a weird thing in his chest at the pet name. “Pick you up tomorrow!” 

“See you tomorrow, Kou,” He called as Bokuto towed Akaashi out the shop. Akaashi stared at him, exasperated as he went. He still looked fond. Bokuto blew a kiss over his shoulder, a huge smile in every little move he made.

Kuroo was so in love with the world and his crappy little coffee shop and all his friends, and possibly a dorky idiot with a stupid dye job and a smile like a sunrise too. But hey, there’d be time to work that out for sure down the line.

“You’re a fucking idiot,” Kenma told him as soon as the door had clicked shut. 

“I know!” He agreed, laughing easily. Hell, he was in such a good mood he might even clean the espresso machine properly. “But I’m an idiot with a  _ date _ .”

“Ughh,” Kenma sighed, “You’re going to be even worse now.” But he was hovering on the brink of a smile as Hinata leaned across the counter to kiss him on the cheek. Tsukishima and Yamaguchi were chatting quietly in a window booth. He was meeting Iwaizumi and Oikawa that evening to go see a movie, Daichi tagging along so Kuroo wasn’t third-wheeling too badly. Kuroo wondered briefly if Terushima might be interested if he heard Daichi was going too. 

Maybe he really _was_ good at matchmaking since everyone else seemed so in love around him. It had been a long, long time since Kuroo had wanted that for himself as well. It had been a long time since the prospect of being that close to someone had filled him with anything but dread. But then Bokuto's face swam back into his mind. And nothing seemed like it would be a problem again. This was what it was _supposed_ to feel like. 

*

**_Pain in the ass Kuroo-san_ **

_ 16:54 So I realised _

_ 16:54 Technically I still owe you a date _

**_GORGEOUS boy_ **

_ 17:01 Please. You really don’t have to. _

**_Pain in the ass Kuroo-san_ **

_ 17:02 Shhhhh _

_ 17:03 So one of my friends has a twin brother _

**_GORGEOUS boy_ **

_ 17:05 Kuroo-san, I am trying to study _

**_Pain in the ass Kuroo-san_ **

_ 17:05 Haven’t you heard how good I am at matchmaking??? _

_ 17:08 He makes AMAZING onigiri  _

**_GORGEOUS boy_ **

_ 17:08 … _

_ 17:09 What’s his name. _

*

(Two months later)

*

“Kai!” Kuroo said with a smile as his friend reached the front of the queue. “How’s it going? You look tired, man.” 

Kai fixed him with a dead eye stare. The bags under his eyes hadn’t gone anywhere, receding briefly after the Christmas break before returning with a vengeance. Spring term brought finals and endless all-nighters for pretty much all of his friends. 

For Kuroo, these were filled with shamefully little studying.

“You know exactly how it’s going.” He said, shaking his head with a tired smile. 

“That roommate still keeping you up?” Kuroo asked innocently as Kai smiled like the fourth horseman.

“Yes, and you’ll never guess. He’s got this  _ loud boyfriend _ now with the most annoying hyena laugh. And the two of them stay up all night making noise, and don’t seem to know how thin the walls are  _ either." _ Kai never stopped smiling, his eyes shut in what would have looked like a peaceful expression if Kuroo hadn’t known him so long. 

“That sounds rough,” Kuroo said sympathetically, passing Kai the takeaway mug with the teabag left in, just the way he liked it. “But I think  _ everyone  _ knows how thin the walls are around here.”

“That would make them assholes, then, wouldn’t it?” Kai said, chuckling as Kuroo pulled a face.

“I don’t know, man, they sound happy.” He replied with a side smile pulling at his lips, his hands loose and relaxed on the counter. 

“Hm.” Kai hummed.  _ "Are _ they happy?” He looked at Kuroo with a question on his face.

He smiled, not even having to think about it. “Yeah.” He said, his eyes flicking past Kai to the door as it crashed open right on cue, his grin stretching as he grabbed the mug he’d finished doodling on earlier from under the counter. If anyone else looked at it, they might wonder why a little cartoon cat was smooching an owl, but it really wouldn't be their business. And he didn't really care, either. Because Bokuto was staring at him, a massive golden smile breaking through the clouds.  


“So fucking happy, you’d never even believe.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Kai is a good person, and he definitely deserves better than the friends he has. 
> 
> If you got this far, I really hope you enjoyed this!! It started out as a joke with a friend and um. Ballooned. Slightly. But yes, himbo Bokuto nation has a huge population, but where's the himbo Kuroo crowd is my question. _please come and talk to me about himbo Kuroo._
> 
> If there's any mistakes, please drop me a note! This is unbeta'ed, and I am a foolish fool. Thank you so much for reading <3 
> 
> (And if you enjoyed, drop me a comment, it makes me very very very happy <3)


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